The complaint is a pest that has raged in our society. Much of this habit comes from the fact that when you claim, you have the feeling of doing something for your situation, but with little or no effort. It is much easier to complain than actually act to change the situation.
Complaining is addictive. And it starts early. At first, the child who complains gets attention of parents, teachers, everyone. It seems a good thing, which leads to create the habit of complaining. However, over time, the person that just complains is annoying. And stay alone.
No one can put up with the person who complains of life. It is boring, sorrel, because only opens his mouth to complain instead of going forward. It’s as if she were the victim of the situation. It is much easier to see yourself like this, because you have a false sense that it has no responsibility for anything that happens. If it works, it is the fault of luck. But if it goes wrong, guilt is bad luck, the life, the world, of others, of anything but her. So the person do not feel so bad when fails.
The act of complain, shows that you had nothing to do with it. You want to believe that’s not your fault. Maybe even convince someone. Maybe get the compassion of other people complaining. Or maybe you get so boring that people prefer not to discuss. Then, it appears that the complaint worked. And the addiction continues.
It is as if the whole world, no problem was as complicated as his. You even get to see the worst problems in other people, but your eyes are directed immediately to something that makes yours problems seem to have less solution, or your attention turns to some advantage that the person has on you.
The boy is quadriplegic, but he is winning in life because, after all, had a family together. Already me – you think – was born in an unstructured home, I had a difficult childhood … Or the girl had a difficult childhood and today won in life – but – you argue – she was lucky and managed to study while working. I had health problems and could not complete college. So making excuses for your failure, you train never find a way out of their problems.
Because that’s what the complaint makes with the person: imprisons in an infinite sequence of failures. You will create a disgrace pattern in your life without realizing it. And the opposite is also true. When you stop complaining and focuses on what you can do to solve the problem, you begin to create a pattern of success that will transform your life.
The writer Maya Angelou was born poor and black in America in 1928, a time of great racial segregation in the country. To make matters worse, suffered a terrible trauma in childhood, was raped by her mother’s boyfriend just before eight years of age. When she told the family what had happened, he was beaten to death. In his childish logic, she deduced that her voice had killed the man. Deeply traumatized and feeling guilty, stopped and remained mute for almost six years.
Even with early traumas and difficulties that made their life get more complicated than the complicated lives of black Americans of that time, Maya built a memorable story. At 16 was the first tram driver from the city of San Francisco. After chasing your dreams, he began building his artistic career. He was a singer, songwriter, actress, screenwriter, writer and poet. He wrote numerous books, including autobiographical without fear of exposing their history. In the 50s, he joined Martin Luther King Jr. in the fight for civil rights, against racial segregation.
Blacks could not attend the same places as white and were seen as inferior beings. Martin Luther King Jr. and his wife had the support and friendship of Maya in the fight against injustice and prejudice. Maya saw his friend being murdered on the day she completed 40 years, but instead of giving up, she got even more engaged in its struggle.
She wanted to help others. She wanted others to understand that black people could change their history, need not bow to what the system had written to them. Maya didn’t study in college, but received more than 30 honorary degrees and she was a university professor for years. She was honored many times in life, including the Presidents Bill Clinton and Barack Obama, who became her friends.
His influence was so great that when he died, in 2014, Obama said it was “one of the brightest lights of our time” and Oprah Winfrey, who was also a friend, summed up: “When you learn, teach. When you do, give. This is one of the best lessons I learned from Maya. ”
An extraordinary woman who overcame unimaginable difficulties within itself and also in society, fought for his dreams and changed the history that the situation around tried to create for her. Maya once said: “If you do not like something, change it. If you can not change it, change your attitude. Do not complain”.
Here is the answer. Whenever a problem arises – any problem in any area, and you realize the old habit of complaining sprouting in your mind, think: what can I do to change this situation? Think of attitudes that can be taken to improve the situation, no matter how small be that attitude. Probably there is something you can do. But if not, change your attitude toward the problem. This is always at your fingertips. His way of reacting to situations determines your success or failure. When everything in your life seems to have gone out of their control, know that the only thing that nobody can take away your control is this: your ability to choose which reaction will have.
Understand that if complaining is a habit that you have learned, you can unlearn. Habits are like that. We learn and can unlearn. Deletes one developing other. If you’re used to complain, start to monitor to change the claim per share. Action is the antidote to the complaint. If you can not do anything to the situation, why complaining? Change, then, your attitude towards the problem, their way of sees it. Decide that everything, absolutely everything, it will work for your good. If you can not reverse the situation, learn from it. Something good will come out of there. It’s your choice.
Your intelligence is a beacon that illuminates your life, but it doesn’t make you walk, is full of smart people in the hole. What makes you walk is to choose react positively, regardless of the circumstances. It is with fight with willpower you will see something change in your life, not complaints.
Everyone has struggles, but victory is not for everyone. Victory is only for those who perseveres. Anyone who wants to embrace the complaint will have to be satisfied with a limited life and a reputation for being a boring and tiresome person. This practice can do much harm to health.
A recent survey by Stanford University has shown that a person who is exposed to 30 minutes of complaints end up suffering physical damage to your brain. The claim damages neurons in the brain area responsible for problem solving. Neurons are literally “peeled” by the claims. This is very serious. Just imagine what can happen to someone who has just damaged neurons in part responsible for solving problems? I mean, the more you complain or live with people who complain, the harder it will be to solve the problems.
On top of this, the study found that claim also drains the person’s energy. So hear complaints leave us so exhausted. And maybe that’s why you end the day crawling home.
So do not get carried away by complaints from others and start taking care not to turn a peeler of neurons. Look for ways to remedy the situation or to face it in a positive way. Learn to use your words and your thoughts in your favor. If your mind does not think of good things, you will think about bad things. And who choose is you.